I totally quit the NaNoWriMo on the second day. I wrote the first day's worth, but quickly decided I'm not much of a novelist. I'm not even very passionate about writing. I do have that novel I started in college, and I wrote another section of it the day before NaNoWriMo started. I like that one, and I will finish it eventually, but I don't like being under time constraints. I'd rather play with yarn than spend all my time writing a dumb story that doesn't matter.
I asked Dan the other day if he thought I could ever make a living playing with yarn. It's true I know more about that than he does and can give a better, more realistic answer. He said when he gets a fat raise and I'm staying home with the kids, I can play with yarn all I want. "When will I have time for yarn if we have kids? We're having kids?! When did that happen?" was my response.
I had another vivid dream last night. I was sitting in church, knitting. It wasn't actually church-time, and my knitting was not at all inappropriate, but I don't remember why I was there. Sheree was sitting in front of me, and she turned around to say something to me. I thought she was going to be upset that I was knitting, but she said, "Knitting is your passion, isn't it?" I thought about it for a second. "Well, I've never really had a passion, but I guess," I said. "No. I can tell," she said, "and you need to keep doing that." Then she turned back around.
Knitting, per se, is not my passion. It is creating things from yarn that I love, and I really wish that was my job. I thought of a book idea today, and I think it will be a huge success. I just need to get permissions from the writer and pattern designers I have in mind.
I may, after all, realize my dream.